Wednesday, January 11, 2006?
today . . . i have read euur old blog . . thru and thru . . . i jux cant get euu out of my head . . euu are really a verii unique gal . . i noe dat wat i am doing now is jux pure dumb . . but at least . . i wont feel shho much pain . .
i will wait fer euu . . . i noe i can . . it might take months . . . maybe even years . . but ill never lose such a gal like euu . . .
reading euur blog has made mi realise lots of things . . have made mi feel wat euu have been thru . . have made mi realise . . euur not jux another memory . . . euur my happiness . . euu r my everything . . .
i am willing to give up everything jux to get euur love in return . . .
i really hope euu r reading thiis . . i really do . . .
guess all that matters now iish euu . . . every moment ill be thinking of euu . . . euu made mi have high hopes . . but pull mi down . .
i don blame euu . . cox love iish blind . . .
even though thinking of euu made mi feel sad . . .
yet i feel damn happy . . . when im thinking of euu smile . . laughing . . .
now i understand . . now i trully feel . . wat is it like to love someone shho much . . .
i don wanna add any burden to euu . . .
so ill jux be here . .
everyday . .
waiting for the miracle ive pray for to come . .
looking at him makes mi think of euu . . .
everything everyone do made mi think of euu . .
we might not have a long time together . .
but euu have already prove to mi that i need euu . . .
i really don wan euu jux as a fren . .
i wan more . .
im selfish i noe . .
shho all i can do now is to stand in the dark corner of euur life . .
staring at euu . .
waiting for the day that euu come pull mi out . . .
?
. . . . . . . .
sky slowly came down on muaii . . .
walls threaten to come in on muaii . . .
and muaii iish jux sobbing in one corner of the room . . .
crying . .
to love someone iish shho easy . .
the feeling iish shho great . . .
muaii threw wateva muaii gort . ..
but gort nth back . .
a scar was made in the process . .
deep and painful . . .
muaii look up at the dark grey sky . .
with tears rolling down muaii cheek . .
and thought to muaii self why all diish mux happen to muaii . .
Now . . .
muaii have to forget all this . .
and leave everything to one thing . .
the only trust worthy thing that muaii can rely on
often betray muaii . .
but often help muaii . .
but never have the heart to let muaii win him . .
and that person iish . .
Time . .
nothing can cure muaii pain and sorrow . .
nothing but Time . .
all muaii can rely on iish him . .
but the scar will always remain . .
remain fresh .. .
fresh in muaii head . .
every single thing that have cox it. . .
muaii . . .
iish . . why
crying . . must
for . . this
euu . . happen
not . .
becox . .
euu . .
hate . . muaii
muaii . . will
iish . . never
becox . . forget
muaii . . euu
cant . .
forget . .
euu . .
Sunday, January 08, 2006?
haiixXx . .
been long since last update. .
finally . . back at muaii own home . . again . . o well . .
muaii new year sux . . .
spent it in police station . . damn fucked up . .
but o well . .
at least it was with the one muaii love. .
hehe .. .
love iish such a lousy thing . . hate it ..
jux don understand . .
everytime muaii wanna love someone with all muaii heart they always have some other pple in mind . .
but this time its different . .
muaii iish going to strive till the end . .
no matter wart . .
muaii have been waiting for gals for far to0 long ..
muaii have nort taste the love for shho long ..
take it as desperate or wat . .
but muaii heart iish only for euu . .
but wart muaii here from others iish dat euu are only using muaii shho dat HE will treat euu better
it seem verii true to muaii . . but can euu pls . . .pls show muaii that its not true . .
pls don make muaii hang by euur side shho dat euu will have a better chance to get hiim back . .
if euu really wanna toy muaii liidat muaii wiill really be verii hurtxXx . .
only hope euur were reading tiis . .
muaii noe euu still love hiim . .
and euu wont love muaii . .
muaii wont deny this fact to muaiiself
but why do euu have to deny thiis fact from muaii . .
muaii iish nort angry becox euu never peii muaii today . .
iish becox of wat euu lied to muaii . .
think properly. . .
muaii iish a sensitive person . .
not paranoid . .
think . . think hard . .
euu said if euu being with muaii iish being unfair to muaii . .
then wats diis . .
pls . .
muaii iish nort a toy . .
muaii iish Kenneth . .
if all this while wat muaii did for euu . . all the times muaii have spent iish jux a bridge for euu
and him patch . .
then tell muaii earlier . . don wait till muaii have love euu shho much . . . den let muaii realise muaiiself. . .
but now .. muaii still love euu truthfully . . . with all muaii heart. . . jux msg muaii . .
for now . . . muaii will go .. shho long. . . have a good life