Tuesday, November 10, 2009?
guess what ..
its actually after 1am i miss her the most.
like what she's doing, slp already or not, eat already or not..
something damn retarded ...
i even thought to myself,
hmmm will she call me later and ask me to meet ?
then immediately from the back of my head "NO"
then i remembered she totally hates me now. haha wth.
i should sleep soon before i start to fantasies again.
0127
i woke up at around 10 because of a very sweet dream.
but the moment i realise that is a dream i feel like shit.
i dun wanna move on ...
i love her ...
how i wish to send her a msg which says
"im sorry but i love u too much, i wont move on."
but .. love isnt selfish..
and that will probably irritate her.
just the thought of not being able to hug her again,
not able to feel her lips against mine again
and not even able to talk to her again brings tears to my eyes.
but is there anything else i can do to make her happy then staying far away.
the only thing now that still ties me and her is the very last few belongings she have with me.
and once i return it to i will have no more excuse, no more reasons to find her, to enter her life.
I would do anything for another chance. I want to be able to love her again.
hug her to sleep, wake up with her beside me, stare deep into her eyes and tell her how much she means to me, that i love her.
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