Thursday, March 25, 2010?
Kenneth Ng ... U ARE A FUCKING USELESS BOYFRIEND ...
why am i never considerate enough ..
why am i at home doing nothing when my girlfriend is in pain at home ..
why is she not picking up my calls ?
why are u so incompetent ...
and a burden to her as well ...
why can i never be better !!!
please teach me how to take care of someone better
Wednesday, March 24, 2010?
its been awhile ..
and again i find myself blogging only when i have troubles...
it seems like the good stuff in life does not motivated me to write it down.
stuff with me and my girlfriend isn't going out well again ...
seems like its my fault again ..
apparently I dun listen to her and I lead a unhealthy lifestyle
like sleeping late .. not doing my work .. etc etc ..
now we came to a conclusion that we should not meet unless in time of needs
till after accesment, maybe its for the better ..
im just unhappy that she's still upset ..
i generally feel that things can resume again ..
its fucked up how we had 2 big arguements already ..
and i still have listening problems ..
i'm starting to feel ...
that i'm not good enough for anyone ..
i always put burden onto another ..
lets see how this goes ..
gonna go prepare now and meet jon to visit my father ..
seems like he is now feeling unwell and admitted into SGH.
Monday, March 08, 2010?
this is it ...
im officially not good enough for anyone ..
im too self centered and I cant even think in the shoes of my girlfriend ..
i always thought that im a awesome boyfriend material guy that is just misunderstood and have no lucks with girls ..
now i know ... i was just in denial ..
i suck as a boyfriend ..
i dunno ... i feel so helpless now ..
there is no way to improve myself in a short amount of time
I kinda regret letting her see my blog too ...
i really want this relationship to work out..
if this relationship fails im just gonna stay single permanently ...
but ill put every ounce of effort i have into this one
but if it still fails then its decided then ..
i really want to hide my weakness and what im thinking from everyone ...
this blog's existence is not to show people of my past or my life.
its just a thing i keep for myself for future references of what i was like in the past..
i want to be the best boyfriend ever ...
but it seems like it's so far away ...
i'm actually having doubts bout myself now...
not a good sign ..
o well ..
i smell another series of daily emo post if situation does not improve.